This photo taken from Kaifeng's official Chinese website, http://www.kaifeng.gov.cn/. Because I like citing my sources.
Where have all the bung-bungs* gone?
And where are all rickshaws?
Where's my streetwise Chinese man
To fight the traffic odds?
Isn't there a blue box
upon wheels of three?
Late at night I look and I look
to return to campus cheaply!
I need a bung-bung!
I need a bung bung to carry me into the night
It's got to be cheap and it's got to be fast,
and it's got to be able to drive.
I need those rickshaws!
I'm holding out for a bung bung with a lower price
Oh it's gunna be hard and it's gunna take luck
When they've all "unionized"**.
Somewhere in the Kaifeng,
in an act of policy,
The mayor got up off his seat and turned to the city.***
"There's too many accidents!" he cried about the street,
"No one knows were to turn or to cross and it's getting quite crazy!"
But...
I need a bung-bung!
I miss those bung-bungs in the dead of the night!
Weaving through cars and weaving through bikes
And taking the old-back roads!****
I miss the bung-bung!
I'm holding out now for taxis 'till the morning light
They start at 5 yuan and only go up
And are far better in a car-fight.
All the rickshaws got bought out by today!
Not a single one remains!
I could swear I can hear them calling out to me~!
Through this chill and the bus and the rain,
I want them back despite safety!
They've gone away, their blue little boxes!
(Blue little box, blue little box, blue little box!)
Oh, the bung-bung!
Bought out for the idea of Kaifeng's safety!
Your drivers were paid and your bodies were crushed
and now you're a memory.
Oh, rickshaws!
How you dominated the streets!
But now your wiles haves shortened your lives,
and Kaifeng moves towards prosperity.
(bung-bung!)
I need a bung-bung!
I miss those bung-bungs in the dead of the night!
Weaving through cars and weaving through bikes
And taking the old-back roads
Oh, rickshaws!
How you dominated the streets!
But now your wiles haves shortened your lives,
and Kaifeng moves towards prosperity.
*Bung Bung is a Chinese onamonapia (I think) for "rickity" because there is no way rickshaws were ever safe. Bung Bung=Rickshaw.
**- One time while getting a rickshaw for about 15 of us, the group of ricksaw drivers all communicated and all set on the same price- 5 yuan for a trip. We'd tried getting smaller prices, but they all joined together. Adam called it best when he shouted, "No! They're unionizing!"
***- No joke, the last mayor got kicked out for being corrupt and taking bribes. This mayor sponsors building buildings, making policies like attempting to license rickshaw drivers (that didn't work out, so he made good on his threat to get rid of rickshaws), beautifying projects and I dunno, not being corrupt. Ji Bingwei is the new mayor's name.
**** If you wanted to even get a glimpse of what people really lived like in Kaifeng, a good way to do so was to take a rickshaw, they were small enough to go through back streets during rush hour. You could see houses, shops, and chickens everywhere. That was a good way to see Kaifeng without actually exploring; you could save those locations to return to them later.
I am somewhat tempted to sing this.
Also I do not own the tune, it is a parody of the song of Pat Benatar, great genius that she is. If you are not aware of the song "Holding out for a hero" I suggest you buy it and listen to it. This particular set of lyrics in no way represents the original nor was it intended for anything other than humor.
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