Grading

Grading has been eating at me. Sorry there have been no updates. So few updates. :(

For Christ-mass, the foreign teachers had secret santa and ate Beijing duck. Not much else, I guess?

Mostly while I have the homework graded, I still have exams to finish. Sorry that life has been so boring. Well, not completely boring (I find excuses to put off grading, silly, silly me), but mostly for excitement around here it's "Let's go to dinner.... in a different part of town!" Whoo.

Whoo-hoo.

Whoo.

Did I mention hoo?

I'll post another update if I can, once the grading gets finished for this class. It'll be finished today. (Then my next final is on the 4th).

updates

In the midst of finals and grads. Had a farewell dinner to Ben and Mallory last night. Tonight we were treated to a Christmas dinner.

Tasty. The best dinners are when there is a western toilet in the VIP area.

Um, let's see...

Sorry no sooner update; between VPN issues and grades, there was not much opportunity.

Yes, the grading is going. Today I managed to get the bulk of it done, but I still have a few that need doing. Tomorrow is the conversation final.

Even though I've mentioned China can be cold, it hasn't been cold recently- since the heat came on and I can now get warm at night, the warmth seeps into my bones, I guess, and I can carry it around with me all day. Sleepy.

Quick update

Headed for bed, so here's a quick update of today.

Met with some English teachers from the department to talk about how classes are going. Unsurprisingly, one Chinese teacher (not the dean) dominated the conversation with the writing teachers. I had to force myself to be heard about a few things. It was suggested I write my own book. Huh. I could. Hmmm.

Then my fellow teachers and I went to the store. A new store. A big store. The biggest store. I bought cheese. Meltykiss, doritos, and...cheese. cheese. CHEESE.

Tired. I will update more on tomorrow if I can, but tomorrow's a busy day

(I found out my schedule, also, and I teach 16 hours, but 12 classes. Next semester I have the most students of anyone. Whoot?)

Kinda not exciting day

Today was pretty meh. Getting the students to ask each other questions by playing head's up 7-up, but if you call on someone, you have to ask them a question. Then as they had their heads down I stole all their water bottles and selected different ones to help describe them.

Strange, but they'll get tested on stuff like that eventually.

Still have movie class. Horray, I think. Horray for movie class? My computer keeps making noises. If it keeps this up, I'm afraid by January I won't have anything. Luckily I've got my grades backed up, and I can go to a net caffe in order to put in the grades, but still. It worries me.

Last month I was eating a lot at West Gate- this month, South Gate. Even though West Gate is cheaper, South Gate offers more restaurants that you sit inside, cheaper food, and I dunno. It's also closer, that might help. Between last month and this month, Adam and Ben translated a menu at another place- that makes the total translated menus I know in this area to 4 restaurants. So we've been hanging out there, mostly because foreigners have a reputation. It's good food, mostly, but we know a waitress there (Adam's student). It also has decent beer.

This post is mid-day. The day could become really exciting without notice! We'll see.

Cold Water, Thankful for Family Life Rant

Today the cold water pressure died. Nobody told us why until after they restored it, either; there was construction. We, as foreign teachers, found out when our toilet tanks did not refill.

I'm realizing slowly the advantages here of being born in my family, a middle class yet somehow rural farm feeling family.

1) I know what circuit breakers are and how to flip them on and off. This is especially useful in the AV classes, for whatever reason they're always turned off. I have yet to see them flip in my apartment.

2) I know how to clean things. When you have mold growing on your bedroom wall, there's nothing like SCRUBBING IT OFF to make you feel proud and accomplished.

3) I know how to fix brand-new (Chinese new) chairs when their wheels fall off.

4) I know when I can and can't install something on the ceiling based on the type of material it has.

5) I know how to shut off the water on a toilet if it overflows.

6) I know how to manually refill a tank on a toilet and how to fix the stopper and lever.

7) I know when to throw things out and what things can be left out for a while (like cake, meat, or soup).

8) I know how to use my A/C unit to help dry my clothes since the humidity in wintertime is still around 80-90%. What.

9) I know why the stray dogs are barking at me and can toss them either a baozi or avoid walking between them and their puppies efficiently.

10) I know why the window has water dripping on it every morning, even if it is not raining. (It deals with the windows here only having one panel, instead of the double sides (or thickness) that a lot of US homes have, especially those who have deep winters).

11) I know not to leave a heater on when I leave the building. Do I forget sometimes, yes, but as soon as I remember I run home or freak out about it (which is why I've now gotten into the habit of turning on the heater after I've locked my outside door).

12) I know why my speakers are fun, but I should not use them all the time (they crinkle sometimes, 'cause ear fatigue, etc).

13) I know how to check the road for cars when I'm crossing. Note: There are no crossings. It's like a game of frogger every day!

14) I can kill my own bugs. With my bare hands. It's a most useful skill.

15) I can sew when my clothes develop holes in the washing machine. Still can't fix the fact that the machine stretches them though.

16) I can travel to China without a checked bag for an entire years' worth of supplies. I'm still proud, even though my parents have shipped me things from home. On the upside, I think of these things as things I knew I didn't need.

17) I can cook emergency meals in the microwave. I can cook, too, but I'm not willing to buy a hot plate just yet.

18) I'm okay eating with a little bit of dirt in my food. Worms do still kill my appetite, but at least I don't feel a need to vomit.

19) Also I know where lamb comes from and when I see the tasty sheep skinned in front of me and it's bloodied carcass carried away, I am aware people will be eating it. The same goes for when I find parts of my pig in bacon that are not normally in bacon, like the skin with hairs attached.

20) Probably more related to Japan- I'm very glad that I'm able to recognize what things are by brands and labels of things here without being able to read them- it's amazing how similar all shampoos look like and how all soaps look the same. Tide looks the same in every country. But it's far more expensive, so I'll just take the one next to it, thank you very much.

I might come up with some more later. For now, I'll end with number 21- being used to having the water turn hot or cold. This probably comes from more of whether or not a toilet was flushed in my house or if everyone had used up the hot water. When you're a family of five, showers are not going to be perfect dreamlike things.

Writing Finals

I have finals today. I am exhausted just from writing, probably because today I sat down and wrote two and a half finals in one go.

Well, more like.... let me explain.

Finals were are a little strict. Firstly, I have to write two finals per course in case someone fails (because they have a chance to retake the final. A lot of schools would rather pass students than fail them, just because it's near impossible to take a class again). Along with two finals per course, I'm also required to turn in an answer key. I won't be giving the final, but I will be grading them.

So what originally looks like 4 finals turns to 6, since I'm the only teacher teaching three courses. At least the students are all bright, cheerful, and cute. :) I'm going to miss teaching them next semester. :(

On the upside, getting attached to my students is always a good thing. They all have the most different opinions (sometimes we disagree, but I expect when I talk to people in general, so it's not an "I am offended" disagreement) between them, and it's just... fun to watch.

Anyway. So tired from finals. So tired.

Picture Update

There's no particular order to these pictures, sorry.

This is from the fancy dinner in Zhengzhou. It was so fancy. So many foreign people. Somehow, Kaifeng has recently acquired more foreign people- there's a wandering Scotsman hanging around. He's awesome fun.

This is me and my student Angel. They all wanted pictures with me. I said okay. Because really, I'd like pictures with them. I've probably had my photo taken up to 200 times now with random people? I should charge money.

This was a concert we were invited to, and showing how few fire codes were accepted by the public. It's nice to know that if I am in a building and there's a fire, I'm likely to die. Yay! We got a free concert, and the man got free foreigners to attend the concert. What a wonderful trade!

HAND CHAIR. Tried to look as evil as possible, but that photo didn't work out, and this one did. By did, I mean my face is still obscure enough. If I didn't want you to see my face, though, I wouldn't have posted me and my student.

This is the hot pot we had when we came back from the small city the second time. It was delicious, and they have the pots heat by induction- so nothing burns but whatever's in the pot.

This is the halloween party. Costumes!

Bobbing for apples.

Adam, Will, and Ben's hands are at a restaurant. I forget where this is.

Local park in Kaifeng. I forget the name. Has "Bo" in it somewhere.

In this month, it is the chrysanthemum festival. Here's what our college had in the middle of the main road.

An Ode to a Cheap and Effective Method of Transport

This photo taken from Kaifeng's official Chinese website, http://www.kaifeng.gov.cn/. Because I like citing my sources.

Where have all the bung-bungs* gone?

And where are all rickshaws?

Where's my streetwise Chinese man

To fight the traffic odds?

Isn't there a blue box

upon wheels of three?

Late at night I look and I look

to return to campus cheaply!

I need a bung-bung!

I need a bung bung to carry me into the night

It's got to be cheap and it's got to be fast,

and it's got to be able to drive.

I need those rickshaws!

I'm holding out for a bung bung with a lower price

Oh it's gunna be hard and it's gunna take luck

When they've all "unionized"**.

Somewhere in the Kaifeng,

in an act of policy,

The mayor got up off his seat and turned to the city.***

"There's too many accidents!" he cried about the street,

"No one knows were to turn or to cross and it's getting quite crazy!"

But...

I need a bung-bung!

I miss those bung-bungs in the dead of the night!

Weaving through cars and weaving through bikes

And taking the old-back roads!****

I miss the bung-bung!

I'm holding out now for taxis 'till the morning light

They start at 5 yuan and only go up

And are far better in a car-fight.

All the rickshaws got bought out by today!

Not a single one remains!

I could swear I can hear them calling out to me~!

Through this chill and the bus and the rain,

I want them back despite safety!

They've gone away, their blue little boxes!

(Blue little box, blue little box, blue little box!)

Oh, the bung-bung!

Bought out for the idea of Kaifeng's safety!

Your drivers were paid and your bodies were crushed

and now you're a memory.

Oh, rickshaws!

How you dominated the streets!

But now your wiles haves shortened your lives,

and Kaifeng moves towards prosperity.

(bung-bung!)

I need a bung-bung!

I miss those bung-bungs in the dead of the night!

Weaving through cars and weaving through bikes

And taking the old-back roads

Oh, rickshaws!

How you dominated the streets!

But now your wiles haves shortened your lives,

and Kaifeng moves towards prosperity.

*Bung Bung is a Chinese onamonapia (I think) for "rickity" because there is no way rickshaws were ever safe. Bung Bung=Rickshaw.

**- One time while getting a rickshaw for about 15 of us, the group of ricksaw drivers all communicated and all set on the same price- 5 yuan for a trip. We'd tried getting smaller prices, but they all joined together. Adam called it best when he shouted, "No! They're unionizing!"

***- No joke, the last mayor got kicked out for being corrupt and taking bribes. This mayor sponsors building buildings, making policies like attempting to license rickshaw drivers (that didn't work out, so he made good on his threat to get rid of rickshaws), beautifying projects and I dunno, not being corrupt. Ji Bingwei is the new mayor's name.

**** If you wanted to even get a glimpse of what people really lived like in Kaifeng, a good way to do so was to take a rickshaw, they were small enough to go through back streets during rush hour. You could see houses, shops, and chickens everywhere. That was a good way to see Kaifeng without actually exploring; you could save those locations to return to them later.

I am somewhat tempted to sing this.

Also I do not own the tune, it is a parody of the song of Pat Benatar, great genius that she is. If you are not aware of the song "Holding out for a hero" I suggest you buy it and listen to it. This particular set of lyrics in no way represents the original nor was it intended for anything other than humor.

Next Semester Worries

Next semester I have at least three classes at 8am. This semester I only have two, and yet getting up for those two is somehow always a challenge. I don't know why.

Oh, yes I know why- I like sleeping far too much. Maybe if I set my alarm to be out of arm's reach, I would be more inclined to get up. Or maybe if I just got up and did things, I would be less lazy.

So I need to prepare for next semester by always trying to rise early! ...I'll practice....soon. Soon.

(On the upside, so far, I have no afternoon classes. This leads to much exploring).

Updates

Today I informed my conversation class about what their final would be on. Whoot, I guess.

I also saw a schedule for next semester. I'm certainly mostly teaching in one college, and I keep my audio-visual class. However, I'm also teaching Ben and Ann's students, the sophomores. I'm teaching the same course I teach Minsheng, Introduction to English Speaking Countries.

This means, actually, that the class I accidentally taught at the beginning of the year, where I tried to teach them is- well, I actually do get to teach them this. Karma.

I think by this point I've kinda settled into China- granted, I've still got my AV teacher status, so all the technology is mine, mine mine! HAHAHAHA, wait. I mean, this means that while I am teaching classes, I'm certainly not working as hard as Adam or Will who have writing papers to teach. But mostly, I feel comfy here. Food poisoning and all.

Also got a trio of sweet speakers. They are brilliant. :) Many thanks to Amelia for them.

Snow

Yay! I have the internet again! This is mostly thanks to Adam, allowing me to use his computer/VPN while I looked up what might be wrong with mine. Turns out the settings changed but I was unaware, and so now I know. Yay!

These next few weeks I'm panicked about finals. I have six to write- 3 finals for 3 classes and 2 variations for each.

Other than that, today we had snow! The rain has been cold and awful, and the wind has been quite strong as well. During Survey class, snow started falling! We have about half an inch, and it's accumulating. Slush is on the ground, which makes it slippery. But I see there's nothing on the streets; no salt, no water. Nor is it really cold enough to turn the snow to ice. All it does is remind me that the cars are skating on slush. Scary when crossing the street!

Sunday Thanksgiving

Yesterday we had thanksgiving. It was pretty fun, having about 15 people show up. We had five nationalities; American, Chinese, Japanese, Australian and German. The turkey we cooked in a convention oven, and we had to use hot plates in order to boil anything. Despite these setbacks, we still managed to have a really decent thanksgiving. We had mashed potatoes and sweet potatoes and broccoli (okay, a lot of broccoli), cookies, turkey (16lbs fed 15 of us really well), stuffing, cranberry sauce, etc. It worked beautifully. I dunno, if there ever was an up day, Thanksgiving was it.

Most of the day I spent watching the turkey or helping peel things (apples, potatoes, carrots, anything because in China you never eat the skin for safety reasons). Everyone had their focus on a dish, but I’d say Adam was the Head chef and I might have been the Souse Chef (sp). It was a lot of fun, and cleanup didn’t take so long. So Thanksgiving, when finally celebrated, was a very, very, very good day.

Proxy Issues and Money Things

I’m still waiting for my proxy to work. Sorry about this sudden rash of updates; Skype is always a good way to talk to me. Or e-mail.

I have a strange nightly ritual which I which correlates to the bank account I have. Every night before I go to bed, I look at the exchange rate between the Yuan and the USD. Every night, I wait, wondering if things will get better or worse, thinking of when to best send my money if I can. I know I’ve still got time, but I like to see when sometimes I earn a little extra dollar since I’m paid in RMB. What I hope is that one day the extra money I’d earn transferring would be used to cover the cost of the fee.

Maybe I’m geeky, but everyone here is well aware that I can accurately give them the current exchange rate. Sadly, it’s always in the form of our monthly salary.

Food Poisoning

Well, it finally happened. Not at all surprised it did happen, and to be fair, I was expecting it sooner.

I have food poisoning. Ick. Most of my expelling food was done in the night, so I was able to sleep/meditate in between my digestive tract wanting nothing inside of it and taking measures to do so. So here I am, Monday morning, feeling much better (no pressure, but still, no appetite), and trying to figure out how much water my stomach will accept before it complains.

On the upside, I have no classes today.

On the downside, tomorrow would be a very important sort of presentation I'm giving. As long as I can force my way through that, I should be fine.

I'm not sure where I got it; another teacher started puking about that same time (20 minutes before my stomach started hurting), so it's possible I got it at the same time he did. But sadly, there's no way of knowing where it came from.

Here's the fun part; with everywhere I eat, I don't know where it came from, but no place would surprise me. There are no official restaurants the same way there are in the states, sometimes the kitchens are just as makeshift as the ones outside. So. It is a mystery.

Preparing for tutoring and presentations

I've offered to help out a school as a guest lecturer.

Oh boy.

Remember, I've got nothing but a B.A. going into China. If anything, I've learned to teach in a sink or swim environment. And that being said, I'm not teaching the more difficult classes (which would be writing). I'm teaching listening, where anything we do is listening. Or I'm teaching history, where I just assume nobody understands and send them the notes to study. Or conversation, which is so basic it hurts.

So, I'm going to do a lecture on Thanksgiving and related food words. I've been pulling pictures (and citing them, that hardly ever happens in China, and when I showed the woman who's helping me put this together, she was confused as to why I would have a works cited page). Essentially, I'll speak, attempt easy, simple English to 200-300 students and officials, play a game of "what is this?", and get photos taken with students. I already had my conversation class take photos of me.

So I'm preparing for that; my powerpoint needed revised.

Also I'm going to intensively practice English with someone else. One a day for 2 weeks, maybe.

Weather

So I think I should tell you about what the weather is like in Kaifeng.

It has started raining, and with the rain brings wet and cold. I found a leak in one of my windows, so now the rain drips through the window onto the windowsill. At least it's not over an electrical socket. All it does is prove that my suspicions that this room was poorly insulated were correct.

Most of the time, Kaifeng is hazy. Not always, but normally it's not so clear and there's fog. If you like seeing the stars, you'll be out of luck most nights. Especially a few weeks ago, when farmers burned their fields. Since cars have picked up in the last three years (more than the older teachers can remember), smog has also increased (and also helps explain why the traffic is so bad).

On other times, it rains. Apparently last year it didn't rain this much, but if you were coming to Kaifeng, it would be safe to bring an umbrella. Or don't, and buy one here. I have a broken umbrella that's still serving me well enough. It rarely storms; if anything, I remember now one night where the wind was strong but there was little storm. Most of the time when it rains, it's a steady fall of rain, probably enough to get you soaked in five minutes if you were walking.

When it rains, you feel colder. You suddenly are wet and cold, and you'll have to wear a few more layers between you and the cold if you can. Otherwise, the cold eats at you. And when you don't have central heating, that's a lot that it eats at you. These past few weeks were a lot of three layers of shirts and two layers of pants, something I rarely do at home! Almost all pajamas were the same- probably because I've realized the blankets provided do not trap heat well. When Mom and Dad sent extra sheets (so I can clean mine, as it takes two days for anything to dry properly), I just piled them on and now have insulation. Yay!

Sunny days do happen, and they're great when they happen. But it's hazy, so you may not see the sun clearly. But when it does, you'll remember how great it is and how it's nice to walk without having your feet in puddles (yes, puddles of many inches), mudpits (yes), and without being so cold. Sunny days are great.

For anyone coming here, my advice would be the same as what I did- wear clothes that you can layer. Because you will be layering.

When I know what winter is like I'll let you know; it's mostly like fall weather in the Midwest right now.

Concert and Heat

Last night I went to a concert hosted by a student. It was really good; like his senior show. Interestingly it was all pop music (though one Buble piece in which, and I quote, “The singer [sung] with the soul of a black man”. The quote is from the singer himself). Not just pop music, but also, it was done karaoke style, with no instruments behind you. Still, it was fun to hear him sing, and we got seats, being foreign people. I think the deal was he looked international, and we got a free concert. Yay!

There were people lined up in the aisles, and we were breaking all sorts of fire codes. I don’t know what else to say about that- people were standing on desks, packed in, just to see this kid.

We came back, and today I’m finishing typing up an explanation about the Republican Presidential Debate. I’m showing it to my audio-visual class. Not only does it improve listening and is an example of an interview, it also lets them know what my country is interested and thinking about when we decide to vote for whom. Also it lets them know about the wide variety of people who want to be president.

Also today I’m hearing drops of water in many places- I think they’re turning on the heat. Whoot. Whoot. Mostly I find leaving my heater on after I come home in my room keeps it warm enough for me to fall asleep in. Leaving it on for hours makes it toasty indeed!

Gulou weekend adventure

Weekends.

It’s very tempting on the weekends to stay inside and chill (and write lesson plans), but yesterday I went to Gulou, which is an area that is kind of the center of the city. It’s more for tourists (a student told me of a different area to visit) and is famous at night-time for the night market, which is a bunch of little stalls selling anything from giant fans to incense to toys to books to food.

But I went in the morning, mainly for one thing- there’s a giant supermarket there, and it sells cheese. Ann and I traveled to the cheese land, looking at many things like small ovens, electric blankets, shampoo that came with a complementary mug, giant teddy bears (it seems to be a popular item over here, bears the size of people). In the end, I got cheese and found some ham. The meat here often tastes the same as dog food in the states smells, but you know, it’s ham. It’s meat. I’ll deal with that, and if I really wanted meat, I’d head somewhere else.

Cooking for myself is not something I’d really thought about- I could, but I’d probably have to buy more than a microwave. Or maybe a tea kettle would be fun. These are all things that could happen, but I currently see no reason to have a tea kettle or to have a oven. But it’s nice to know I’m not limited here.

La la la teaching again

I recovered from the sick!

…Wait. Hanging around too much Chinese. I am no longer ill!

So today I taught class, and actually ate food. No. I did that. All by myself, I ate food. Like I am a grown adult ate my food.

Conversation class went like this: We made lists of things people liked and disliked, and I asked them why they liked or disliked something, and then for agreeing and disagreeing I had them take votes and explain their positions. We talked about the most important things in life, which was not “water”, “food”, “shelter” or “health”, but instead “family”. Then I made them play “heads up, 7-up”, while I wrote on the board the group homework skit I want them to do in three weeks. I think it will be fun. Maybe.

In visual class I showed the last episode of Oprah. It spoke to a lot of students and they seemed to really like it. That episode is good for feeling like you’re worth something, and that’s something we all want to feel. Besides, Oprah speaks clearly and slowly, so she’s wonderful to understand. Many students afterward told me they had wanted to cry with that show.

After that… huh…. Well, Since I had to cancel Tuesday’s class (Survey Class)(See: sickness) a lot of students also asked me when we’ll make up class. My response: We can make up a class?

The things I am learning. If I had kept the schedule, both classes would be even now. Drat.

The things I am learning.

Also today

Well, I think aside from the first week I was here, I'm starting to get a cold. It's been raining, my fingers feel a little pain in the joints (I sound so old), I was really, really tired this morning, and I've been tired ever since. I didn't walk to lunch but I did walk to the office to inquire about a package that should have come maybe a few days ago. It was there, in someone else's office, and Adam (who was also expecting a package) went with me to inquire. He got a letter and we were informed there were packages for us upstairs. But after that trekking, I felt weak. I shouldn't have been that weak, out of breath and just achy. So I think I must have some sort of cold. Hopefully it will clear up.

Oh yes today I got a package and inside it were sheets, conditioner, starburst, tampons, and other things mom had collected from inside my room. So this particular package was mostly just a shipping cost....

I have one more package coming, but that's useful and I'll update you about it more later. Until then I've asked them to stop sending packages, it's expensive. Whether they do it or not, I have no idea, but at least I know that I've made my request clear.

I have discovered that my space heater works, although there is little space it heats and a lot of space to fill. Sad. I see many long days away from my desk because theres no outlet that I can plug the heater into.

I also see it warming up the bedroom, because that place is so dank and daft it hurts at night. I often am tempted to just sleep on the sofa in my living room. Oh well.

Class Setups

I know I haven’t updated the blog that frequently. Sorry about that. At this point the days feel a bit repetitive.

My survey class normally goes like this: Write a power point of maybe 40-50 slides, show videos in-between the slides, there’s a break in the middle of two hours. Most of the class is spent speaking and lecturing, not interacting. Since the idea of the class is getting an idea and information, not learning a skill, there’s little practice or interaction.

The class starts with a “Hello”, and then a quiz, in which I tell them not to speak or have their books open or I’ll fail their quiz for that day. I’ve not caught anybody cheating yet, but I have a good feeling that’s in part because I need to read the questions out loud while presenting them on the screen.

Both classrooms have a projector, but my Friday class, I discovered, has a microphone that works, so I use the microphone to speak. The Friday projector has issues with the color yellow, so maps are hard to read and present. I go through my files and presentation, there’s a break, continue the presentation of a mix between power point, pictures, and video.

I chose power point not because I think it’s a good teaching tool, but because I think it’ll be a useful review tool. I get the points on the slides, I send them to the students to review because a lot of them struggle with understanding oral English. Apparently, with the microphone, it helps them understand what I’m saying- maybe it’s because they’re used to hearing English through a system and electronically, or maybe because it’s louder- I remember hearing something about microphones in elementary schools, and that it went really well then. So I have a combination of videos, power points, and a microphone in teaching.

In my audio visual class, there’s a lot more interaction. We have maybe 20 minutes of talking at the beginning, and then we watch the video. When we reach the part with the script, we’ll then listen, follow along with the script, then read through the script, ask me questions, and listen to the video again. I often can go through this 2 times, and there’s a little bit of time left over to show a fun video at the end. The video is fun, not quizzed, and usually visually interesting. I’m hoping it’s merely a fun way to listen to English. I know they all want subtitles, but I refuse; I want them to practice listening.

The setup of that class is nice; I have control of the master computer, and they only have displays that I can control. Isn’t that fun? I think that’s fun. I have another display screen to make sure that I see what they see. The only downside is that I feel that from behind my massive computer desk, I am far away. I enjoy being in front of the students, so I’ll often walk in front of the desk even if it doesn’t work out well.

My conversation class is little more than a blackboard, podium, and their desks. I finally managed to get them to sit in a circle, but each day is a little different. That’s probably the most fly by the seat of my pants class that I do teach.

They’re all very cute and lovely, though. I enjoy them very much, and they enjoy my trick-or-treating class excursions very much.

Exciting musical Thursday

Today I had audio-visual class, where I showed them The Daily Show. John Stewart talks quite fast, but the interview with Larry King Live had a lot of visual gags, too, so they weren’t left out in the cold.

Also, at noon two students of Adam and I took us to a restaurant downtown in Bookstore St. It was a nice restaurant, and then we walked down the street.

I remember shopping.

It didn’t help that today was payday.

Even so, I resisted my urges to by a giant teddy-bear pillow (Relakuman for anyone who knows him) and instead bought a small punching bag for less than $10 dollars. It’ll do me well, I hope, and it’s light enough to hang from my ceiling. I also located stores with weights for when I work myself up to them. Not going to lie, Want to work myself up to weights before I buy them. Otherwise I’d feel it was a waste.

Suddenly, without the internet I have acquired things I wanted. Oh boy. Oh boy.

Then we stopped for cheese and headed back to town. The girls came to visit so I took let them see pictures of when I was in Japan and some videos of home. They saw pictures of my younger cousin’s birthday cake and think she is very cute and very unafraid of anything.

Then tonight I decided to go with a couple of people to New Campus to hear them jam on some drums/guitars. We went to New Campus, met the German teacher Toby, had some new night market food (bread with some pork on it, I can’t find pork where I eat in stall food often, so I think I live in the more Muslim side of town), listened to guys jam on band equipment before heading back.

Fun times.

(Oh and this morning I forgot my flashdrive so I had to run back to my room to fetch it)

Here's what my schedule looks like, by the way

Hey, for a real update this time I'm going to let you know formally what classes I'm teaching on what days.

Tuesdays: Survey of English Speaking Countries. Minsheng College Transfer Juniors, Class 3. About 45 students. 14:30-16:20.

Wednesdays: Business English Conversation. Eurasia College Freshman, Class...? About 25 students. 10:10-12:00.

Audio-Visual Comprehension. Foreign Language College Juniors, Class 2. 31 students. 14:30-16:20.

Thursdays: Audio-Visual Comprehension. Foreign Language College Juniors, Class 1. 32 people. 8:00-9:50.

Fridays: Audio-Visual Comprehension. Foreign Language College Juniors, Class 3. 32 students. 8-9:50

Audio Visual Comprehension. Foreign Language College Juniors, Class 4. 32 students. 10:10-12:00.

Survey of English Speaking Countries. Minsheng College Transfer Juniors, Classes 1 and 2. 90-100 students, probably. I've never counted. 14:30-16:20.

I'll go in depth about these different classes and structures tomorrow.

Right now, remember this: Eurasia college < Minsheng College < Foreign Language College.

That's how the acceptance goes, anyway.

Also:

Freshman < Sophomores < Juniors < Seniors < Grad School Students (equal or less than) Foreign teachers < Regular teachers < College Senior staff < College Vice Dean

A letter I've been meaning to write

Dear Jon-Michael,

Who are you?

That's a strange way to start the letter. But sometimes, Jon-Michael, I'm afraid. I'm afraid that you and I are actually the same person. I'm afraid that when you left China you never actually left, and that I was reborn to be the replacement English teacher for the next year. So when you hopped on the plane, your soul was transplanted into my awaiting body, because everyone knows there's no lands outside China. It's all an illusion.

I have inherited your apartment. What happened to the apartment, Jon-Michael? It was so dusty, but now I know that wasn't your fault. You did leave a lot of assignments in a drawer, though. That was a lot of paper to throw away. You also left a few glasses, and a bucket for which I am thankful. But you also left a broken heater (maybe you also did not know how to use it?) and wax on the floor.

Where did the wax come from, Jon-Michael? Were you making candles? Were you making soap? I can't imagine why on earth there is red/brownish wax on my floor. At least I was informed that the lizard skeleton and the writing on the walls was not you.

Did the writing bother you too? Did it whisper to you, our soul from three years ago, a message? I imagine it actually says to me, "Hello!" and "This is a cool place to go!" and "All who inherit this apartment are actually the same person!"

Do you know what else I have inherited from you, Jon-Michael?

Your students.

They talk about you. All the time. As if I should know you. As if I should be you. Constantly they remind me of how we should be the same. I inherited your apartment, after all.

This is no more evident than today, when I translated a Japanese speaker from a news story. Our students, our awesome students, they said, "Oh, you speak Japanese! Just like Jon-Michael!"

I then explained that I'd lived in Japan for a year and a half, which is why I understood Japanese.

"Oh! Just like Jon-Michael! He lived in Japan too! He was also a very fun teacher!"

Who are you? Why do you haunt me at every turn? You and I, we speak Japanese, we have the same apartment, but we're not alike, right?

Right?

Oh wait.

Our birthdays.

I'm a day older than you. Officially.

Somehow I do not find this comforting. Somehow this theory of mine, that I am your reincarnated soul in China, it holds more water with this fact.

So I've tried to learn about you, but there's only so much I can learn from people. I know you were a vegan. I know you liked drinking. I know you were a lot of fun, and that your students love you even now and have not forgotten you. You were everything I am not; shorter, skinny, vegan, and a man.

Why do you haunt me so? Why do you fill my thoughts, making me everyday wonder about what sort of person you are?

Wait.

I remember.

You named your wireless "The Poopery".

...

WHO DOES THAT?

With much love,

The person who inherited your apartment, students, and cannot figure you out for the life of me but I'm pretty sure you're a cool guy,

Eaaf

PS ALSO WE TOLD THE SAME HALLOWEEN STORY NOES

Trick or Treat

Today was Halloween. Not really, but I explained Halloween to my conversation class. I'd ask them what they would be. One girl said Sailor Moon. One girl said a teacher, but I didn't think she understood the question, so I asked again. She said fairy. Among my favorites were Iron Man and fish.

Then I took them trick or treating, going to Will's class first. We had candy, and then we left (I'll bring some to Will's class next week since they didn't get any candy), and we went to Adam's class for more trick-or-treating. Adam's class was last, and since there was extra, we tossed it out to the students so they could fight over it. My class wanted to keep going trick-or-treating, but I had run out of treats. I told them on Halloween, anyone who comes to my house will be able to get candy. :)

They liked the trick-or-treating very much.

Movie in the Survey Class

This afternoon my survey class was ahead of the other (they were at a meeting), so I showed them the movie Blow Dry to get a taste of what English countryside life is like.

There were dead people (in China they cremate their loved ones), there was high fashion, there were small town jokes, a lot more seriousness than I remembered, and, oh yes, lesbians.

I forgot for a moment that might ick some people out. Right. Sorry class, better get used to the foreigners okay with sleeping with people of the same gender. Not everyone is okay with it, but society has come to accept it, no matter how grudgingly, and it shows up in our media. Whoops.

They enjoyed the lack of quiz, though.

And there were sheep! It's always fun to see sheep.

Other than that, remember the student who I explained sex to? Well, she asked me questions today about the female anatomy. She'd never seen a picture of a uterus before, let alone know what all the different parts were. Nor did she know why women had their period before, either. So I showed her lots of pictures of diagrams, uterus, clitoris, penis, and baby diagrams (I will say I like the baby ones the best). I explained how giving birth works ("It's so big! How can it fit?").

She says she's afraid of being dumb, or sounding stupid. But she's not stupid. Not by a long shot. She's curious, and wants to know, and smart about so many things, so when I explain to her I feel like I'm explaining how to construct a sentence in English. She asks a lot of questions and we go into each one. It takes time to learn this stuff.

I don't mind explaining. I rather like finding out what schools do and don't teach you in China, and I enjoy informing people. I try to do it in a way that they don't feel awkward, either, and I don't beat around the bush. I'd rather give her some sex education, because I feel that that's necessary to have safe sex. She was telling me of classmates that didn't know about condoms existing, got pregnant, and ended up having back-door abortions that left them unable to have children. Oh, and the guys left them. None of that should happen. They should have been informed and given the tools to make safe sex choices. (Because, when it's said in done, those that want to have sex will have sex, and I'd rather make it safe that not acknowledge what they're going to do).

So I had fun with that.

Then I went to English Corner, had cake, had more cake. I also somehow managed to steal William's hat, so now I have a green hat. (If a man in China wears a green hat, it means his wife/girlfriend is cheating on him). Granted, the hat is not mine for keeps, but whatevs. I will have it for today, and will probably give it back in the morning. But it makes for a neat social custom story, so it's justified.

Adam's Birthday

Posting pictures tomorrow.

Had tickets to a few parks, so I went with Ann, Will, Tamir, and a student named Viola to a park about a female soldier. It was pretty cool; I also got a fight taped after it. (I only had 5 tickets, and as I went outside to invite people I ran into 4 other people, and they were the ones who came with me).

Then we went to Lazy Cat Pizza, with really good pizza and we ate a bunch for Adam’s birthday!

While we were on our way there, we almost got hit by a bus. The driving in Kaifeng is bad, and I always think there will be an accident, but this one the bus was a couple of centimeters away after it stopped from our rickshaw, and there was nowhere to jump out. We all passively looked at the bus, and thought, “Well, possible we’ll get hit by that bus, not much we can do”. The driving in Kaifeng is really bad, like I said, and there are a lot of almost accidents I’ve been in- far too many for USA driving standards- but this one was pretty bad. When we’re in a rickshaw, there is really nothing keeping the bus from us.

So that was a bit scary. Though I’m partially telling you this story because often when you are in a rickshaw or taxi or car, you will have far too many close calls for you to keep caring about each individual one- scary as the bus was, I’ll have forgotten it, I’m sure, in a week.

Current Event Time

If you’ve been keeping up with the news, you’re aware that there’s been a girl in China who was run over by two vans, and passed by many people on the street until someone, a street sweeper, called for help and rescued her. This event has sparked a lot of controversy, as many people talk about how China needs to re-embrace its moral code and how people need to help one another. (The girl died if you have not heard that new part of information).

Today a student came by, J, and helped explain it to me. J had some extra tickets she wanted to give me, so I accepted them. I can now get into a few parks for free sooner, and not just after Nov. 1rst, when I originally thought I would! (I was going to attempt a Monday update about a new park I visited once that arrived).

J said a year ago, there was a similar incident, except it involved an old woman. The old woman was hit by a car in Nanjing (according to her), and a man rushed over to help. The old woman ended up suing the man and took the case to one of the highest courts. The old woman won.

So now nobody wants to help people in China. She asked me if I would, and my response was naturally, “of course!” but then I took a moment to think. Would I help someone I saw in the street? And the answer in China is no, I would not. I don’t know enough Chinese to rush to anyone’s rescue, I don’t know how to flag help (I can't even call for it), and also, I am aware foreigners get blamed a lot for any accident they show up in, helpful or not. Does this make me a bad person?

….

Last night the Beloit Professors left. I got to thank Betsy for helping me get the job in Kaifeng, mentioned I was leaning toward two years here (I say this with a grain of salt, but yeah, I can see myself here for another year), sang at karaoke. With a Peking Duck restaurant, it was really quite delicious!

Awkward Question Time

Today I started class as I normally do, which is ask about their week. I’m teaching TV and listening, so I figure conversation isn’t going to ruin the entire syllabus. The students of my Thursday class are aware that I sleep late and enjoy waking up past 6am (why China, do you get up so early), so they asked what time I woke up. I told them the truth, which was 7:30. Then someone asked about what I did for breakfast, and I told them I had no breakfast.

They all gasped and told me that was unhealthy, and then they asked if I was ever hungry. And I said no, and if I don’t feel hungry I don’t go eat, and sometimes I miss lunch, too.

This created more gasps and someone asked me if I had an eating disorder, and aren’t those popular in America?

I laughed and said that I eat when I’m hungry and I’m a fan of eating as I patted my stomach. But then we started talking about anorexia and bulimia and how and why people have these disorders in the states.

These questions may seem strange, but actually, I welcome them. They’re so different from the questions I normally get (every day at English Corner, it’s “Where are you from?” “When did you get to China?” “Why did you come here?” “How old are you?”). But this was not the most amusing question of the day.

Tonight, to celebrate the Chrysanthemum festival this week (Kaifeng’s special festival), there was a concert put on by the students. I went for a little while, but then I went to English Corner, where I was the only teacher there. So 40-some students gathered around me, some left afterwards, but I told them to ask me anything at all. We talked about Mac computers, about life in the states and buying a house, etc.

It gets better.

Adam had gone to the festival, and when he came back he brought with him 4 teachers; Morgan, from Alaska/Seattle/California (not sure where exactly), Tim, from Australia (not sure where), and Toby, from Germany (also not sure where).

Toby is strange, new and exciting to the students, so they asked him to introduce himself. He said “Mein Name ist Toby” (I think, that’s what it sounded like, anyway). The students laughed and asked him to say it again, but in German. I laughed and explained that he was speaking German, and long ago, English and German were the same language, so sometimes they sound the same (but it’s important to remember that the grammar is vastly, vastly different).

So then the most interesting question of today was asked. “Do you like Hitler?” one student asked Toby. He asked me first (apparently I was a translator for fast speech or politically correctness, and I continued to translate when Adam and Toby started talking to each other quickly (Tim was doing things on his own, bein’ awesome like that)). Toby took the question in stride, with a few jokes, too, and explained that no, he did not like Hitler and Germany was very strict about not liking Hitler, to the point, he thought, that they focused on it a little too much. He’s a history teacher normally, so he thinks the history books focus too much on Hitler and could be focused on something else. He explained how the German flag is rarely shown, and how the German government cracks down on anything that might be related to the Nazi party.

There was no awkwardness, really. Just like in class earlier this morning- it’s good to answer questions as we explain our cultures, and it’s nice to have questions that are not “where are you from?”

No matter how shocking they may seem.

After Conversation Class today:

Finished with my conversation class. They’re so cute and tiny. Not all of them, but they’re young, and energetic. One student, Young, didn’t show up today- well, if he doesn’t show up, then he gets no attendance points. Several students did not do their homework so I reminded the class that they are graded on the homework and it is part of their final grade.

That scared a few.

Oh well. We did an example telephone conversation at the beginning of class. I was going to originally cover two chapters, but then I had the students read the Request and Offer dialogue out loud. It covered important things, like “tips”, and I noticed many people rushed through the words and took unnatural pauses, and emphasized the wrong words. So I taught them, with chalk and use of the flat line, how to emphasize “oh my god” correctly (you don’t say that phrase flat, guys). We talked about tips, I asked how we could tell about a request or an offer through script (could you, would you, can you, if you don’t mind, I can, I would, etc.)

Then we talked about pauses, and I made them pause and raise their voice for a question. We talked about how to make the word “cat” a question (raising your voice), and we talked about how different inflections mean different things. I used the sentence “I didn’t steal the cookie this morning”, and how by stressing a different word, the sentence has a different meaning. It was a lot of fun. Especially the pauses, they really make someone sound native or not native, I think.

Update for the suicide stuffs

So the update on the suicide thing. I asked Jackie about what happened and what’s going on, if as a foreigner it’s being not talked about in front of me. Jackie was very honest and said that everyone knows, but nobody talks about it. Every year, he said, 5 to 6 students kill themselves, and the college never talks about it openly. The parents are mad, but nobody wants to mention it.

Tonight as I was rounding down English corner, a girl came to talk to me. She was in my class on Friday. My Friday afternoon class has been cancelled since they all have a meeting. She was upset that she wouldn’t be able to make it up, and she told me she really wanted to study Queen Victoria (who shows up next lesson), and if we made the class up on Saturday or Sunday. She’s leaving for the weekend, because she was on the first floor and the girl fell underneath her window, and she needs to get away. We talked a little bit about if she could talk to people, why she didn’t feel she could, that everyone feels guilty, and I hugged her three times. Then I told her I’d be online for her if she needed me, and we’re talking on qq messenger right now.

Adam also talked to her, but he didn’t feel comfortable hugging her- in the states, no problem, but in China, there’s all sorts of questions that rise in your head for culture. But I hugged her, as being a woman, it was less of a problem for me to hug a female student.

So for next week, I’ll cancel Tuesday’s class. For Friday, they have a meeting instead of class, so there is no class, and that’s not something I can change. I won’t try to make it up, either. I planned for an extra week in case things went wrong.